Yup, you’re seeing clearly, we sponsored our first party, and it was fucking epic. Don’t mind the fact that I’m drinking Coors Light, I needed them for my wizard stick (which was completed at the 15 beer mark around 10:00pm). I had a cup of craft beer with me on the side, so I didn’t spend the entire night only drinking silver bullets.
The Sexty is a party that those who know about it look forward to all year round. It’s a celebration of 6 summer birthdays for a group of best friends, and it is hands down the most well orchestrated party I’ve ever been to. I mean, they even make up awards and have an full presentation ceremony to recognize the best attendees. This was the 4th annual installment of this summer shindig, and it just keeps getting better. There were around 80 people there this year, a ton to drink, a ton to eat, and most importantly – some of the most epic competitions known to man. When you weren’t hitting the ice luge or tossing back Jell-O shots, you could participate in a ridiculous game of musical chairs, or try to take down the gauntlet of amazing drinkers in a funnel race, shotgun showdown, and starting this year, the Team Chug sponsored Chug Off.
As you know, we’re all about bringing you entertainment here at Team Chug. That’s what we were looking to provide to the good people of the Cinco de Sexty party. After minimal thought and a couple beers, we came up with the Chug-Off Tournament.
We went with a 8 person single elimination bracket style tournament. Chuggers went head to head with one simple rule: Finish your beer without spilling before the other guy does. If you spilled at all, you were disqualified. Each chugger was wearing a toilet seat cover over their heads as a spill detector and humiliation enhancer. If you didn’t finish your chug in one attempt, you were disqualified. If for whatever reason both chuggers were disqualified, we had plenty of back up brews ready to go for a re-chug (but these guys were all fucking badasses and no re-chugs were needed).
We thought that the big craft beers might scare off a few people from signing up for the event, but interest spiked early and we got the 8 people needed to fill out the bracket. Maybe the fact that they were competing for a chance to win this T-Shirt helped a bit:
The rules were explained, the toilet seat covers went on, the beers were poured, and Round 1 got started.
Round 1 Beer: Newburyport Brewing – Pale Ale – 5.5%ABV
Where do I start? This little known gem has been one of the best finds for me in a long time. Newburyport Pale Ale is far from you average pale ale. Sure, it has the characteristics, nice light color, solid carbonation, and a fairly low ABV, but holy balls do they pack the flavor into this beer. It’s got an amazingly sweet sugary malt backbone with a huge hit of hops for a beer falling under the label of “pale ale”. It’s more like an IPA, but isn’t going to knock you out or make the beer novice shy away. It was a great Round 1 brew to get these guys into the swing of things.
E-RAY vs JEFF
Our first chug of the day showed the rules being enforced and really set a precedent for what is considered an acceptable chug and what these guys would have to do to move on. E-RAY came out strong and absolutely crushed his beer. JEFF went with more of a slow and steady approach, and it paid off. You can’t see it in the video, but E-RAY had a solid spill mark on that toilet seat cover, so unfortunately he was eliminated. I’m curious how he would have faired if he had made it past this beer, because that was a quick chug. But hey, rules are rules, and JEFF finished his beer cleanly, so he made the move to Round 2!
NICK vs EDDIE $
Monster. Absolute monster. EDDIE $ came out of the gates flying on this chug and didn’t look back. Even NICK took a break at the end of his chug in a state of complete awe. Probably the only one not impressed with his chugging abilities was the chugger himself. No celebration at all, the Barry Sanders of the chugging game. Hey EDDIE $, get your ass into Round 2!
JAWAAN vs NICO
Love the variety in these chugging styles. JAWAAN – Statuesque power pose while completely dominating the chug with one hand in his pocket. NICO – Ya I’m spilling, so what, I’m going to finish this beer because it’s fucking delicious. You know the rules, you spill and you’re out. JAWAAN finishes with the chug with a clean toilet seat cover, so he’s onto Round 2!
WALL-E (John) vs CREELS
Holy fucking photo finish. I should have made these guys both chug again so that maybe it would be easier to pick the winner. Two solid competitors, two solid chugs. The final quick tip of the cup by CREELS gave him the win, but both guys deserve a round of applause for this stand-off. DJ CREELMIX makes the move to Round 2!
Round 1 was amazing, and people were starting to really get into it! Check out Chelsea running in place during CREELS chug, I legit can’t stop laughing.
Round 2 Beer: Dogfish Head Brewing – Indian Brown Ale – 7.2%ABV
Brown Ales are meant to be somewhat low key, medium mouthfeel, low abv, and heavy on the malts. Dogfish took this standard and said “Eehhhh, let’s spice that up a notch.” A brewery known for being “Off-Centered” took this standard ale style and flipped it on it’s head. Indian Brown Ale has a hop content like an IPA, a malt content like a scotch ale, and the color and mouthfeel of an American Brown. It’s a prefect blend of BIG flavor, medium to high carbonation, solid hop presence, and overall badassery.
We wanted to give these guys some variety, but also give them a hell of a challenge. At 7.2% this seemed like a good jump for a competitor that was worthy enough to make it to Round 2. In a way each chugger was going against each other, but also battling what was in their glass.
JEFF vs EDDIE $
Have you ever stared directly in the eyes of pure determination? That’s how JEFF spent this particular 6 seconds of his life. EDDIE $ was not getting beat in this round and he knew that the second he poured his beer. Pure cold hearted determination on this chug. JEFF had an incredibly solid chug as well, but it couldn’t hold up to the fire that EDDIE $ lit under his own ass. EDDIE $ made it to the finals!
JAWAAN vs CREELS
Every once in a while we arrive at the finish line a little early, right guys? No? Just me?…..liars. Well that’s what happened on this chug. CREELS was so fired up to throw this beer back that the initial tip of the cup ended up in a DQ. JAWAAN had a clear road to the finals, as long as he didn’t spill. So he did what any man would have done and actually took a second to enjoy the delicious brew he was holding. He finished spill-free, and landed himself in the finals!
Championship Beer: Anderson Valley Brewing – Heelch O’Hops Double IPA – 8.6%ABV
You hear “Double IPA” and you think it’s going to be hopped to the high heavens. At 100 IBU, you bet your ass that it actually is. But, what’s nice about this brew is that it is VERY heavily malted, so you don’t get overloaded with hops. In fact, they almost disappear. It’s loaded with thick malty citrus caramel flavor, with a heavy consistency but not overpowering. Heelch O’Hops brings it all to the table, and being the winner of our 2014 Chug Madness bracket we thought it’d be a prefect chug for the Championship Round!
JAWAAN vs EDDIE $
The Championship round had it all: Perfect music by DJ CREELMIX, people running to get the perfect video, and two of the best damn chugs of the entire night. This beer is no fucking joke, but these two took it down like it was Round 1. Not sure if it was the wave he was riding coming out of Round 2, the sweet neon Sexty hat, or the mid-chug pointing move that propelled EDDIE $ to greatness, but whatever it was it worked. EDDIE $ tipped back the final drop of this delicious beer before JAWAAN did, and earned himself a T-Shirt and bragging rights of being the best damn chugger at the party.
The Cinco de Sexty 2014 party will forever be one to remember. We were so happy to be a part of it and sponsor the first ever Chug-Off tournament. It won’t be our last. The party went on all night. Food. Dancing. Drinking. Best of all – great people.
Everybody had a great time, but only one can walk away saying he was the Team Chug Chug-Off Champion. Here’s to you, EDDIE $! Cheers!